From The Couch: Round 10

From The Couch: Round 10

Rugby League How To Vote Card: If you are voting on the big issues of Rugby League next Saturday – as I assume we all are – then here is how Scotty from Marketing and Albo stand up:

Genuine Love of League
Morrison: 5
Albanese: 10

ScoMo has used the Sharks as a vehicle to make himself more human, more working class. Morrison has also shown no loyalty to teams having allegedly supported the Roosters before moving to The Shire. His CV in 2006 showed interest in AFL and union teams but no Rugby League. Albo is working class who sees the South Sydney Rabbitohs as a religion. 

Genuine Hatred of Rugby Union
Morrison: 0
Albanese: 10

Morrison seemingly loves rugby union. When living in New Zealand he declared himself a lover of the All Blacks. He also listed on his CV his teams as Randwick and Waratahs. He has numerous tweets where he declares rugby “his game” and that he is “more of a rugby fan.” Albo, as a working class Inner West lad, despises the game. 

Support of AFL
Morrison: 5
Albanese: 3

Morrison has somehow aligned himself with the Western Bulldogs. Something to do with someone called Rodney Eade. Albo has played plenty of AFL including in the Community Cup. Albo does appear to have some genuine interest while Morrison’s is another ‘love’ of convenience. 

Likelihood to Invest in Rugby League
Morrison: 6
Albanese: 4

ScoMo loves the pork barrel and will give money to league if he can. Albo loves the game but also has some principles. Neither will be overly supportive of the NSW government investing in league infrastructure. 

Likelihood to Present Dally M Medal
Morrison: 8
Albanese: 10

Morrison has undertaken one of the most important roles a PM can do but has missed the awards too. Albo wouldn’t miss it if he was on fire. 

Likelihood of Having PVL’s Supprt
Morrison: 6
Albanese: 4

It is hard to know if PVL is a Lib or an ALP voter. Working class suggests Labor. Greek background and love of power suggests Liberal. He has been linked with a run for NSW Premier with the Liberal Party so a small lean ScoMo here. 

Overall
Morrison: 30
Albanese: 41

Albo is the standout Rugby League vote and those voting to prioritise the GGOA will be behind Labor come Saturday. 

Magic Weekend Really Is Magic: The NRL doesn’t always pull the right rein but they have absolutely nailed the concept of Magic Round. Within three years it has become a true festival of Rugby League, a celebration of all that is great about the game. Sell outs, a colourful sea of jerseys, big games and big presentations … it has been wonderful. And any talk of it leaving Brisbane should result in the departure of the idiot who makes said comments. 

Australians of the Year: The grounds staff at Suncorp Stadium. To have the ground in such a stunning state on Sunday afternoon after five games and torrential rain for a week was an act of utter greatness. These are some of the most talented high achievers in Australia. 

Poll of the Week: On Twitter I asked who is more qualified to coach the Bulldogs: Trent Barrett and respected journalist Mike Meehall Wood’s dog. An overwhelming 93% voted for the canine, who reportedly is a “good boy”. 

Dally M Atrocities of the Week – Round 10: The atrocities in Dally M voting for Round 10:

• Andrew Johns again showed his ridiculous bias towards halfbacks by giving 3 votes to Nathan Cleary and leaving Villiame Kikau and Jarome Luai out
• Paul Whatuira is off his head giving Brad Schneider three votes and Hudson Young just one and Josh Papalii zero. 

2022  Field Goal Update – 16: Sam Walker kicked the first Magic Round field goal, an intelligent first half one that had a major impact on the game.
Fun Fact #1: No Prime Minister has selected the Prime Minister’s XIIIe

Fun Fact #2: Gerard Sutton and Ashley Klein did not contrive a penalty try in Magic Round out of nothing.

Fun Fact #3: Tyran Wishart is Rod Wishart’s son.

Betting Market of the Week: The most magic part of Magic Round was:

$4.00: Trent Barrett finally showing his true colours
$6.00: Gold Coast and St George Illawarra missed field goals
$3.00: Sione Katoa trying to catch a ball
$1.80: Elisea Katoa lying
$1.30: The Tigers playing two Juniors

Rumour Mill: Bulldogs pair Matt Dufty and Paul Vaughan have been linked with moves to Super League. The Roosters are reportedly in salary cap strife with the NRL refusing to register Angus Crichton’s extension. Cameron Munster has been linked to the Roosters too but that would be a stunning signing and highly unlikely. Selwyn Cobbo is in the sights of the South Sydney Rabbitohs. 

Moronic Coaching Decision of the Week: Only the genius Trent could think: “wet conditions, a game we can win, let’s make a late change and bring back Jayden Okunbor”. 

The Coaching Crosshairs: The clowns on the Bulldogs board have finally clicked that Trent Barrett is one of the worst coaches in the history of the league. His position is reportedly in jeopardy following a horrific showing in Magic Round that highlighted just how behind the club is and how little advancement they have made over the 18 months under Barrett. Despite being hired on a poor resume and then being granted a year of grace because the Bulldogs had no players, he spent a fortune on players, almost all of whom have been dreadful for the Bulldogs. The worst have been those who he lured from Penrith – Waddell, Naden – with Dufty and Pangai not far behind. This is to say nothing of his numerous failed pet projects led by the likes of Averillo at halfback and Okunbor allowed anywhere near first grade. It is an absolute disgrace how protected Barrett is. If Gould truly believes Barrett should be the coach, he is as dumb as Canterbury’s game plan on Friday night and should be sacked or, worse, made to coach the team. Looking at Friday night, the Bulldogs are as far away from improving now as they were under Dean Pay. It is embarrassing that the Bulldogs could spend so much and achieve so little. The players look like they introduced themselves to each other in the tunnel. Only half seemed like they have seen a football before. The team clearly hadn’t trained, which probably wasn’t necessary, given the overly-simplistic nature of the deception-free attacking plan. There was zero passion, zero care-factor, zero pride. Team selections were as bad as the interchange rotation. There were zero redeeming qualities to Friday’s coaching and anyone who thinks otherwise are off their rocker. Barrett should go and so should anyone who supports him having a job on Tuesday should be banished from the club for life.  

Watch It: Gee betting ads used to be a lot more fun and positive. No gamble responsibly this or deposit limit that. Just bet on FootyTab and win a motza, “you’ll be so glad when you win”. Watch this 1983 FootyTab ad here.