Season 2008: Round 23

From The Couch

Judas Notes #1… With legal proceedings against Judas completed and an agreement reached, the NRL needs to come out and definitively state that Williams will never again be allowed to play in the National Rugby League. David Gallop should also look to reach an agreement with the English Super League that will ensure he is never signed by an English club either. Williams needs to be excluded from the game for good.

Judas Notes #2… This author has been on the lookout for a bookmaker to offer a price on when Williams misses his first match for Toulon with injury. No bookmaker, to date, has been forthcoming. The prediction is that Williams will not last long. Watching him break down will be one of the true pleasures of my year.

Judas Notes #3… Braith Anasta, when asked by a severely intoxicated Punting Ace columnist sporting a playoff beard, determined that the whole Judas Williams affair was “disappointing”. Insightful.

Where’s Willie?… Don’t go looking for the goofy character with the big black spectacles and the matching red-and-white pullover and beanie (Armani, I believe). Look for the fool with the enormous mouth and the red, white and blue jersey. Willie, of course, is much easier to find than Wally. Wally likes to hurl himself into the action. Willie, well, he can usually be found mooching three in from the winger. He will never be found with the ball in his hands in his own half. Usually at the scene of a penalty or a handling error (near the tryline, of course; Willie likes to take his shot at personal glory), Willie will be near by, blowing up and pleading his innocence. There is absolutely no doubt in the world that Willie Mason is the laziest forward in rugby league, a bludger who seems to be living off the myth he has created for himself. His real talent isn’t as a rugby league player but as a hypnotist. He shouldn’t be playing first grade, let alone representative football. The sooner the powers-that-be recognise this, the better off we all will be.

Crazy Fun in Wigan… Todd Carney is reportedly on his way to play for Wigan. He will join fellow beer connoisseur Tim Smith not only in the town but in the halves. The road to Wigan pier could be a little blurry for both.

Crazy Fun in Hull… Clint Newton, of the Hull Kingston Rovers, is excited about his new flatmate, Michael Crocker, soon to be of the Hull Sharks. Residents of Hull, however, are not as excited. Passionate rugby league fans with a penchant for petty violence and thuggery, residents of Hull are appalled that two arch-rivals are living under the one roof. Things could, as they say, get a little interesting.

Brisbane Ben… There are few players in the NRL who play with less heart than Ben Te’o. His commitment against the Eels was just astounding. In thirty-five minutes Te’o took only two runs and made only fourteen tackles, missing four in the process. Good luck with that next season, Brisbane. He will go down as the worst recruit of 2009.

Coaching Stocks…

Value	LW	Coach	Comment
5.0	5.0	Craig Bellamy	The Storm are rolling like a champion at the moment. Bellamy understands the ebbs and flows better than any coach.
5.0	4.5	Neil Henry	The underrated Raiders are winning and playing attractive league. Henry is one of the finest tacticians in league.
4.0	4.5	Wayne Bennett	The Broncos seem to be struggling to get any momentum. Bennett may not have the troops he once had.
4.0	4.5	Brian Smith	The Knights have been playing well but could not get his side ready for Canberra. They are likely done for this year.
3.5	4.5	Des Hasler	The loss to Souths was Manly's worst in many years. Hasler has to get Manly back up after big games.
3.5	4.0	Ricky Stuart	Stuart's dour game is starting to come unstuck. They will limp into the finals and go bang-bang.
3.0	3.5	Tim Sheens	Another season without a finals campaign. A great thinker but he has lost his ability to coach consistent football.
3.0	2.5	Ivan Cleary	With their stars back on deck, the Warriors are peaking at the right time. Can make some waves in the finals.
2.5	3.0	Brad Fittler	The Roosters are too one-dimensional in attack and brittle in defense. They are going to struggle for the rest of '08.
2.5	2.0	John Cartwright	Cartwright is a fine mentor and got his boys up for Prince's return. His players love him and that counts for a lot.
1.5	1.0	Nathan Brown	Brown seems to have the edge over some teams and Brisbane is one of them. He may get his boys into the finals.
1.5	0.5	Jason Tayler	Huge win over Manly. He still struggles with gameplans but with Sandow, he can give Souths confidence for '09.
1.0	0.5	Michael Hagan	Parra again won when things went their way. They are flat track bullies. Hagan is too nice for his team.
0.5	0.0	Matt Elliott	Elliott is hanging by a thread. Needs to make the finals to be back next season.
-2.5	-2.0	Ian Millward	The Titans game was there to win but Millward couldn't orchestrate it. Cowboys are happy they didn't hire him for '09.
03.5	-2.5	Steve Folkes	The Dogs are playing without heart, commitment, enthusiasm or talent. A sad end for a fine coach.

 

The Colin Best Express Fan Revue… Fans of the Colin Best Express were once again rewarded last Sunday when CBE finished off a great movement to score the opening try of the Raiders clash with Newcastle. It is the fourth time this season the Colin Best Express has scored the first try of a match, putting him equal with the Sharks paper-towel David Simmons for the leading first tryscorer in the NRL. I am not one to advocate betting in such markets but bettors could do worse than get on board CBE for the remainder of the year. The Raiders do, of course, play the three worst teams in the NRL.

Round Twenty-Three in 1999… Defending premiers Brisbane outscored the Sydney Roosters two tries to one but needed a late Darren Lockyer field goal to get the two competition points, winning 9-8. The Parramatta Eels won in a similar fashion, scoring two tries to Penrith’s one and relying on a Ben Kusto field goal to get the win 17-16 in a thrilling derby affair. Mark “Boozy”Hughes scored a hat-trick, Robbie O’Davis got a double and Andrew Johns had a personal tally of twenty in Newcastle’s 60-0 win over South Sydney. The centerpiece of fitness and hard work, Owen Craigie, scored four points from two conversions. Western Suburbs were also shut out, held scoreless while the Sharks put on forty-six points. Chris McKenna and the Colin Best Express scored doubles. Jason “Toots” Croker had a day to remember at Bruce Stadium, crossing the line four times in the Raiders 46-16 decimation of Norths. Jason Taylor went 0/4 with the boot.

Game of the Year Nomination, Round 23… North Queensland-Gold Coast, 20-26. The value of Titans halfback Scott Prince was on show for all to see Saturday night when the courageous playmaker returned from a broken arm six weeks ahead of schedule to save the Titans seemingly forlorn finals hopes. Wrapped in a protective arm brace, Prince laid on three of the Titans five tries to inspire a much needed win against the last placed Cowboys. It was a performance of class and great bravery. In the end the Titans held firm over the last twenty minutes after Prince had put them ahead, giving back to their captain after he had put in so much for them. This writer was once highly critical of Prince as a player. Not anymore. Over the last season he has come of age and is deserved of the highest accolades.

Great Canterbury Outside Back of Yesteryear… Matt Ryan. Every Bulldogs fan loved Matthew Ryan. Just loved him. The laconic and shy wing/centre was a staple in the Canterbury team list throughout the nineties. Debuting in 1990, Ryan pulled the plug on his top grade career in 1993 after only nineteen matches, heading off to play for Narrabri. A back injury and home sickness had taken its toll. Peter Moore knew how good Ryan was, however, and he was re-signed for the 1994 season where he was flying before a back injury sidelined him until the Grand Final against Canberra, a match of great heartache for the Bulldogs. 1995 was a little kinder to him with Ryan playing a key hand in the Bulldogs Grand Final victory. Ryan missed the 1996 season after a knee injury in his first match but what followed was a career year in Super League. Ryan was the competition’s top tryscorer and represented New South Wales three times in the Tri-Series, scoring a try in New South Wales’s fabled 23-22 win over Queensland. In 1998 Ryan had his first injury-free season since 1991 but Steve Folkes was obviously not as fond of Ryan as the incomparable Chris Anderson and dropped him on the eve of the Bulldogs great finals run. It was a sad end for a Bulldogs stalwart who could have been a regular member on the representative scene if a constant array of injuries didn’t hold him back. He is a certainty in my Bulldogs team of the nineties.

Fantasy Players of the Week… Terry Campese, Michael Jennings, Jarrad Hayne, Brett Stewart, Mark Gasnier, Anthony Laffranchi, Cameron Smith, Trent Waterhouse, David Fa’alogo, Steve Menzies, David Milne, Feleti Mateo, Chris Heighington.

Surprise Fantasy Players of the Week… Chris Sandow, Nathan Merritt, Ben Hornby, Taulima Tautai, Luke Rooney, Mo Blair, Kaine Manihera, Joe Picker.

Rebecca Wilson-Danny Wiedler, Postscript III… Anyone not convinced of this germ’s role in the Judas Williams defection need only read his sickening piece in this week’s
Sun Herald. It was a piece that induced high levels of nausea in most decent human beings. Someone needs to flog this nasty virus before he spreads anymore of his indigestible propaganda.

And One Final Thought… The dressing shed shots of the Parramatta team before they hit the paddock against the Wests Tigers told a fairly interesting tale. Many of the young islander players had their arms wrapped tightly around each other as final instructions were delivered by coach Michael Hagan and captain Nathan Cayless. The circle was broken, however, by warhorse Nathan Hindmarsh, who stood with his arms by his side. The pictures merely illustrated what many in the rugby league community already know; Parramatta are a team divided. The fault lines are drawn between the hard working senior players and many of the flashy young upstarts who appear more interested in a good time post-match than they are about winning matches and working hard. The strife began pre-season when Nathan Hindmarsh said he did not have the younger player’s “backs” after they found trouble in King’s Cross. The on-field efforts of the team this year highlight that the fence was never really mended. Nathan Hindmarsh was, of course, right in his comments and it is a little sad to see such a warrior forced to play in a team so driven by ego and self-interest. Michael Hagan should do the club a favour and bring his young players into line before he ends up with a club in complete disarray.