Season 2010: Round 13

From The Couch

Laurie Daley is an Imbecile and other thoughts on the NSW Origin Team: One need only have listened to Laurie Daley throughout Monday night’s telecast to get a fair grip of how utterly stupid the man is. He was unaware of the rules when talking about the advantage law. He could not adequately explain why a squad of 21 was chosen when quizzed. He could not even confirm that skipper Kurt Gidley would start. Ladies and gentlemen, this is one of the men entrusted to select the New South Wales team.

Anyway, some other thoughts:

• The 21-man squad reflects how far the selection panel is out of their depth. It is understandable that cover be given with two possible suspensions and a number of injury concerns but a 17-man team should have been selected with players placed on standby for Hayne and Lewis. A 21-man squad creates confusion and nothing more. New South Wales supporters do not even know who the captain of the team is.

• The right call was made to drop Josh Perry and Brett Kimmorley. Perry was an embarrassment to the Blues jersey in Origin I while Kimmorley, who put up an admirable performance in the series opener, is simply not in good enough form and is not creative enough to win a meaningful match for the Blues next week.

• On the halves, it is apparent that selectors have no idea what they will do. Kurt Gidley, Trent Barrett and Mitchell Pearce are all in the running for the two halves positions. Gidley is captain but may not win a starting spot and could therefore lose the captaincy. Barrett has done nothing for the Sharks yet has won a recall despite Bob McCarthy stating that Kimmorley was dropped for “younger legs”. Pearce has done enough to earn a shot. Once again Jamie Soward and Terry Campese were overlooked despite those two being the best options. Most concerning with the halves is the clear lack of a plan. Laurie Daley argued that all three were chosen to allow for various permutations mainly dealing with Hayne’s judiciary hearing. What does that make of Josh Dugan’s selection then? If Dugan isn’t going to be a straight up swap for Hayne then why pick him? The selectors have hidden behind the judiciary to buy more time because they patently do not have a plan.

• It is wonderful to see Josh Dugan selected. Dugan has earned his spot and regardless of the outcome of Hayne’s hearing, Dugan should play. The odds are fairly long he will get a run, however, even if Hayne does go down.

• Nathan Hindmarsh and Paul Gallen were both deserved recalls. The Blues lacked a workhorse in game one and Hindmarsh and Gallen both fill that role. Both should be in the seventeen but Hindmarsh will most likely be cut.

• Luke O’Donnell was a ridiculous selection. He should not have been in a squad of 51 let alone 21. He is a dumb and reckless footballer, a grub and a fool. He is a liability and he should not be anywhere near the squad.

• Blues selectors once again made a mess of the centres. Four were selected in Matt Cooper, Timana Tahu, Beau Scott and Jamal Idris. Somehow Michael Jennings, arguably the form centre of the competition and the best available right centre NSW have, was left out while Jamie Lyon was not considered due to injury. For starters, let’s hope the selectors go with two centres and two centres only though one of Idris or Tahu is likely to be selected on a wing. It defies belief that Matt Cooper has retained his spot after going off with a bruised hip in the softest Origin injury substitution ever. While Beau Scott is a deserving Origin player, he is yet another defensive centre who lacks the attacking flair to worry Queensland. Beau Champion would have been a better play than namesake Scott. The Blues will once again go in with little firepower in the centres as they maintain a stubborn belief in the big defensive centre model despite consistent failure.

• The prop rotation is again weak. Only three specialist props were selected in Mick Weyman, Brett White and debutant Jason King though Tom Learoyd-Lars will be used as a prop. This has to be a joke. Brett White should have had his ass kicked back to Melbourne after a soft display in game one. Learoyd-Lars can only play in 10 minutes bursts. Weyman is under an injury cloud. And Jason King is nothing more than a fair player for Manly. The likes of Kade Snowden, Luke Douglas and Aiden Tolman were all overlooked. There is no depth to the rotation despite 21 players being selected. Quite unbelievable. The Blues are once again going to get belted up front.

So there it is. There are some pleasing signs with the squad but the selectors will most likely make a mess of the team. At any rate, the Blues lack the punch up front and out wide to worry Queensland. Unless the likes of Hannant, Thaiday, Shillington and Myles go on strike, the Maroons are only a week away from wrapping up a fifth straight Origin series.

The Storm Clouds Darken: The Melbourne Storm situation is seemingly going to get a lot uglier over the coming weeks and months. News Limited have sent down their heavy hitters to stop the renegade Storm directors from launching legal action against the penalty handed down by the NRL. Players are refusing to be interviewed by investigators with word coming from News that some players may have been complicit in the rort as it emerged that some players had multiple contracts including Cameron Smith. The court action is likely to lead to some explosive revelations. Brian Waldron is likely to speak out soon after the court case.

This entire situation is getting extraordinarily messy. It is clear that News do not want any court action taken against the NRL by the Storm. They have tried reasoning with the rebel directors but may be forced to get heavy handed and fire the directors, a very real possibility. News are also believed to be fed up with the playing group and coaching staff who have shown their support for the rebel directors. News has seemingly taken a position where they will paint the players as part of the scam.

The only conclusion that can be drawn from this is that News does not want court action because they either have something to hide as an organisation or, more likely, they view it as extraordinarily bad for both News and the long term survival of the Storm. The likes of Cameron Smith would be well advised to be careful what they wish for because he may very well do significant harm to his legacy and rugby league in Victoria if he is found to be part of the scam.

Whatever happens, be sure and certain that this is going to get messier and uglier than it already is.

Police Brutality: It is shameful that Todd Carney and Jake Friend were both searched after leaving a Coogee McDonalds on Saturday night. Friend was found with valium prescribed to somebody else. It is absolutely criminal that these hotheaded police officers feel they have the right to target footballers, particularly over something as trivial as being in possession of some valium. They most likely would have gone after Carney and Friend for jaywalking had these jackboots not found any valium. The New South Wales police force have once again taken the law into their own hands, getting heavy handed on citizens for no apparent reason than their own sport.

Jarryd Hayne is a Little Bitch: Jarryd Hayne deserves to be suspended for being such a little pussy cat. He head-butted Billy Slater because Slater had a bit to say and now is pleading innocent. It may have been a weak head-butt and it may have been harmless but the fact is it was a head-butt and he should be sidelined. It just happens to be good luck for us all that the missed game is Origin II. Hayne is a coward and a little bitch and it came as no surprise that he chose to lay a head-butt on rather than duke it out. He should be suspended for being such a little pansy if nothing else.

Follow the Queensland Mentality: The National Rugby League should take the lead of Ross Livermore and the Queensland Rugby League. Livermore last week stated that any Queensland team containing Israel Folau will not be accepted. Livermore went further suggesting that Lote Tuqiri has not been recalled because of his defection to rugby union nearly a decade back. Out of necessity Tuqiri may get called up for Origin II but that will only come about because of Brent Tate’s broken jaw. He still may miss out, however, with Jharal Yow Yeh being mentioned in dispatches. It would be pleasing to see the QRL stay true and leave Tuqiri out. It would be more pleasing to see the NRL follow the lead of the QRL and put in place bans for those players who defect to a rival code. The NRL cannot just watch these fools ditch rugby league only to return later on with their pockets full.

Thank You for Being a Friend: Well, it is farewell and goodbye to Golden Girl Rue McClanahan. The third Golden Girl in three years kicked the bucket with the always saucy Blanche Deveraux a critical element to the success of The Golden Girls. Defying the odds, Betty White has seen off her three contemporaries though betting would not be long on her seeing out 2011 the way the Golden Girls have trended over the last three years. At any rate, goodbye Rue McClanahan, you were a pal and a confidant and if you threw a party and invited everyone you knew, you would see the biggest gift would be from me and the card attached would say thank you for being a friend.

Fun Fact #1: With South Sydney very nearly breaking an 11 year drought of holding a team scoreless, here is a list of the last time each club held an opponent to zero.

Dragons	May 28, 2010	30-0 v Parramatta at Kogarah
Cronulla	April 3, 2010	11-0 v Parramatta at Shark Park
Newcastle	Sept 6, 2009	35-0 v Penrith at Energy Australia
Melbourne	Sept 5, 2009	30-0 v Warriors Mt Smart Stadium
Parramatta	Aug 2, 2009	30-0 v Cronulla at Shark Park
Canberra	Aug 1, 2009	56-0 v Brisbane at Bruce Stadium
Warriors	June 12, 2009	13-0 v Newcastle at Mt Smart Stadium
Manly	Oct 5, 2008	40-0 v Melbourne at ANZ Stadium
Roosters	Sept 5, 2008	10-0 v Dragons at SFS
Gold Coast	June 9, 2008	18-0 v Melbourne at Skilled Park
Brisbane	August 27, 2006	23-0 v Parramatta at Parramatta Stadium
Canterbury	July 22, 2006	25-0 v Roosters at ANZ Stadium
North Qld	Sept 25, 2005	29-0 v Parramatta at ANZ Stadium
Penrith	July 5, 2003	20-0 v Cronulla at Shark Park
Tigers	Never	Never held an opponent scoreless since joining the NRL in 2000
Souths	July 3, 1999	20-0 v Penrith at Penrith Park

 

Fun Fact #2: A list of the last time a team was held scoreless.

Souths	June 25, 2006	0-66 v Warriors at ANZ Stadium
North Qld	August 12, 2006	0-26 v Warriors at Mt Smart Stadium
Manly	Sept 15, 2006	0-28 v Dragons at SFS
Gold Coast	Never	Never held scoreless since joining the NRL in 2007
Canberra	April 21, 2007	0-26 v Cronulla at Shark Park
Canterbury	July 28, 2008	0-30 v Dragons at ANZ Stadium
Dragons	Sept 5, 2008	0-10 v Roosters at SFS
Melbourne	October 5, 2008	0-40 v Manly at ANZ Stadium
Roosters	April 25, 2009	0-29 v Dragons at SFS
Tigers	May 31, 2009	0-14 v Warriors at Mt Smart Stadium
Newcastle	June 12, 2009	0-13 v Warriors at Mt Smart Stadium
Brisbance	August 1, 2009	0-56 v Canberra at Bruce Stadium
Warriors	Sept 5, 2009	0-30 v Melbourne at Mt Smart Stadium
Penrith	Sept 6, 2009	0-35 v Newcastle at Energy Australia
Cronulla	May 1, 2010	0-38 v Dragons at Win Stadium
Parramatta	May 28, 2010	0-30 v Dragons at Kogarah

 

Rumour File: Word has it that not only will Danny Buderus be at Canberra next season and possibly sooner but he will be joined by Cronulla five-eighth Trent Barrett. Both will provide some much needed experience for the Raiders in key positions that will elevate the club into genuine premiership contention. New England fullback and Storm NSW Cup player Gareth Widdop is being highly sought after with South Sydney leading the way. There is a big push in Brisbane for the Broncos to sign Cameron Smith. The Storm remain favourites to keep Smith but if forced out then he will be a Bronco. Panther ballplayer Frank Pritchard is expected to be at Cronulla next season as Stuart Flanagan starts rebuilding a club devoid of class. The Bulldogs have placed a time limit on Trent Hodkinson as the club chases a halfback for 2011. Stephen Kearney is shortening by the day to be in charge of the New Zealand Warriors next season.

That Try: The Cronulla-Sutherland Sharks may have very little to hang their hats on at present but the prospects of young fullback Nathan Gardner are immense and his future bright. His length-of-the-field, width-of-the-field special on Saturday night where he beat nearly every Rooster yet went over untouched was one of the most outstanding tries you could ever hope to see. He scored it in only his 4th ever top grade match. He has shown composure, zip and maturity at the back and his attacking spark is going to be key to the Sharks revival. Nathan Gardner is a very real prospect for rookie of the year honours this season.

Sir Mad Butcher: From The Couch could not have been more pleased to hear that one of rugby league’s great promoters and fans, Peter Leitch, aka The Mad Butcher, was knighted in the Queen’s Birthday Honours list. The Mad Butcher is the most recognisable rugby league fan in New Zealand, missing no more than “a couple of games” in the Warriors history with the club retiring the number 19 jersey in his honour. His first involvement in league came over 40 years ago when he donated meat to his beloved Mangere East Hawks. Since then he has risen to manage the New Zealand Tri Nations team, is a beloved working class hero in his home land and has given plenty back to rugby league including purchasing numerous tickets for New Zealand passport holders to matches in Australia. It is pleasing to see the Queen pay homage to a rugby league champion despite the fact Sir Mad Butcher called it a “blow for the working class”.

The Willie M Medal: Where bad players whose only talent is to remain in the top grade are given their proper dues…

 

Parramatta-Melbourne	3-Billy Slater (Mel)
	2-Brett Finch (Mel)
	1-Krisnan Inu (Par)
Canterbury-Tigers	3-Brett Kimmorley (Bul)
	2-Blake Green (Bul)
	1-Buddy Gordon (Bul)
Penrith-Newcastle	3-James McManus (New)
	2-Wes Naiqama (New)
	1-Jarrod Mullen (New)
Roosters-Cronulla	3-Jared Waera-Hargraves (Roo)
	2-Anthony Minichiello (Roo)
	1-Todd Carney (Roo)
Warriors-Dragons	3-James Maloney (War)
	2-Neville Costigan (Dra)
	1-Lewis Brown (War)
Canberra-Gold Coast	3-Mark Minichiello (GC)
	2-Joseph Tomane (GC)
	1-Preston Campbell (GC)
Manly-Brisbane	3-Ben Farrar (Man)
	2-George Rose (Man)
	1-Josh Perry (Man)
Souths-Cowboys	3-Michael Bani (Cow)
	2-Carl Webb (Cow)
	1-Willie Tonga (Cow)
Leaderboard	12-Preston Cambell (GC), Joseph Tomane (GC)
	10-Trent Barrett (Cro), James Maloney (War), Manrk Minichiello (GC), Chris Sandow (Sou), Carl Webb (Cow)
	9-Todd Carney (Roo), Scott Dureau (New)
	8-Greg Bird (GC), Eric Grothe (Par), Denan Kemp (Brs), Brett Kimmorley (Bul), Josh McCrone (Can)
	7-Blake Green (Bul), Ben Roberts (Bul)

 

Big thanks to “Big Daddy” Kendall who took over some of the voting duties this week. Chris Parkinson of Tokyo also deserves a mention as he regularly contributes his thoughts to this medal he suggests is the most prestigious in rugby league and one that is appropriately named.

Power Rankings:

Rank	Team	Record	Last Week	High	Low
1	Dragons	10-3	1	1	2
2	Souths	7-5	3	2	16
3	Manly	7-5	2	2	10
4	Penrith	8-4	6	3	11
5	West Tigers	7-5	7	3	8
6	Gold Coast	7-5	4	2	6
7	Brisbane	6-6	8	7	15
8	Parramatta	6-6	9	3	13
9	Canberra	5-6	10	9	15
10	Warriors	5-7	12	7	13
11	Roosters	6-6	5	4	11
12	Canterbury	3-9	11	5	12
13	Cronulla	4-8	14	12	15
14	Newcastle	4-8	13	10	14
15	Cowboys	3-9	15	12	15
*	Melbourne	8-4	*	*	*

Where Would the Melbourne Storm Be If: The Storm would be rolling along in third position and probably not keeping appointments or attending interviews.

Game of the Year Nomination, Round 13: Parramatta-Melbourne, 24-10. A cracking weekend of action with a number of exciting matches including the free-flowing two-half duel between Canberra and the Gold Coast and the hard fought clash between the Warriors and the Dragons but the much anticipated Grand Final replay between Melbourne and Parramatta was the pick of the games. The match was heavily built up with many in the Parramatta fanbase claiming that the 2009 premiership was rightfully theirs. Parramatta fans are, of course, delusional and the fact less than 8,000 people turned up to watch the match shows once again that the club has more bluster than punch. Parramatta have no rights to the title and can consider themselves lucky to have even made the finals. I also wouldn’t mind seeing the books of the Eels examined but we shall leave it at that for the meanwhile. The Storm jumped the gun in heavy conditions with a fabulous try to Billy Slater, the old Cronk-Slater firm bringing it again. It was about Slater’s only happy moment of the night, however, with Billy error prone and feisty throughout the course of the match. In the end Parramatta ran away comfortable victors with Joel Reddy, Tim Mannah and Jarryd Hayne among the best. It was the threats of violence, however, that made this match stand out with Billy Slater and Jarryd Hayne, known for their dislike of each other, going at it all night. The culmination was Hayne head-butting Slater and facing a probable suspension while Slater was sin binned for a Randy “Macho Man” Savage like elbow to the back of Hayne’s head. This is one of the best rivalries in the NRL.

Top 10 Rivalries in the NRL: While on rivalries, here are the 10 best rivalries in the NRL:

1. Canterbury-Parramatta
2. Melbourne-Brisbane
3. Melbourne-Parramatta
4. Canterbury-Roosters
5. Manly-Parramatta
6. Canterbury-Dragons
7. Brisbane-Roosters
8. Melbourne-Manly
9. Dragons-Brisbane
10. Wests Tigers-South Sydney

Coaching Stocks:

Wayne Bennett [5] The Dragons keep on ticking over. They are the best team in the NRL and by a long way.

Craig Bellamy [4] The Storm wanted that win over the Eels but couldn’t get it together. Court case is worrying.

Matt Elliott [4] Pounded a disappointing Knights team. Huge to win without Petero. Playing with confidence.

John Lang [4] Lang is such a smart, likable coach and he is proving to be a winner again. Doing a top job.

Des Hasler [3.5] Injury worries but need to show improvement at Brooky. Not playing smart enough.

John Cartwright [2.5] A terrible opening half in Canberra. Does a good job but needs to drop protected species.

Tim Sheens [2.5] Gritty win over the Dogs. An unusual type of win for Tigers. Back on track thanks to camp.

Ivan Henjak [2.5] Somehow he has pulled the season from the fire. Huge win over Manly. Back in it.

Brian Smith [2] Embarrassing defeat to Cronulla. Going nowhere until they can put in back-to-back efforts.

Daniel Anderson [2] The Eels lifted for the GF replay. Still some obvious holes in attack and effort quotient.

Kevin Moore [1.5] Tough to blame Moore but he hasn’t got an answer for why the Bulldogs are so dreadful.

David Furner [1.5] Worrying second half collapse again but got the points against a solid team this week.

Rick Stone [-1] Disgraceful first half effort. Lacking in talent but no excuse for poor application.

Neil Henry [-1.5] Lucky he has a 5 year deal because he would be gone if his contract was up soon.

Ivan Cleary [-3.5] Top notch effort against competition’s best team. Will worry some teams when on.

Ricky Stuart [-3.5] Already finished but it was a huge win over his old team. Seem to play loose, for once.
 

Obscure Score of the Week: While The Mad Butcher will have been pleased with his recent knighthood, he would have been extremely disappointed by the performance of his beloved Mangere East Hawks. The Hawks, who boast the likes of Tea Ropati, Ali Lauititi, George Mann and Lesley Vainkolo among their former players, were thumped by the Glenora Bears to the tune of 48-10. The Hawks and Bears were both 3-3 going into the Fox Memorial Qualification match but Mangere East were given a bath as Glenora touched them up in fine style. Mangere East won their one and only Fox Memorial in 2003.

Queanbeyan Kangaroos 2010 Campaign: The good times just keep on rolling at Freebody Oval with the Queanbeyan Kangaroos racking up another victory. This week the Roos rolled straight over the top of the Tuggeranong Bushrangers 36-26 in a spirited affair. It was the Roos fourth straight win and has pushed the Aaron Gorrell led team up to second on the ladder, only a single point off competition leaders Belconnen United Scholars. Next week the mighty Roos take on the winless Yass Magpies with another win seemingly assured.

Stats from the Penguin: Ben Pomeroy has four losing streaks of seven or more games in his 95 match “career” including a 13 game streak that spanned two clubs and three seasons with Pomeroy not playing in a winning first grade team between Penrith’s 16-14 win over the Warriors on May 1, 2005 and Cronulla’s 18-0 win over Penrith in the opening round of the 2007 season. BONUS PENGUIN FACT: Alphabetically, Pomeroy sits between Stuart Pierce and Michael Porter at Cronulla and between Kevin Pobjie and Alan Powell at Penrith.

Fantasy Team of the Week:

1. Josh Hoffman (Brisbane)
2. Nathan Merritt (Souths)
3. Joel Reddy (Parramatta)
4. Israel Folau (Brisbane)
5. Brad Tighe (Penrith)
6. Darren Lockyer (Brisbane)
7. Scott Prince (Gold Coast)
13. Corey Parker (Brisbane)
12. Paul Gallen (Cronulla)
11. Nathan Hindmarsh (Parramatta)
10. Michael Hodgson (Bulldogs)
9. Glen Butriss (Canberra)
8. Shane Tronc (Brisbane)

Waiver Wire Advice: Parramatta prop Tim Mannah is coming into his own at present with an outstanding performance against premiers Melbourne. Mannah made 209 metres on 22 hits in only 41 minutes in a tremendous display of prop forward play. At less than $200k he is a great bench filler. Get involved with Cronulla fullback Nathan Gardner. He is a precocious talent whose price will only rise in coming weeks. The $140k price tag is only going to shoot up with Gardner now a key element of Cronulla’s attack. He probably isn’t starting material but he is a good backup. Brisbane’s Corey Parker is also well worth a mention. He may be a touch over $400k but he is the best fantasy player this year and is never going to let you down.

Watch It: Warning. This video is truly awful. For those that disdain cringe-worthy television, this video is best avoided. What we have here is a video of Daily Telegraph editor Phil Rothfield trying to steal the NRL Trophy from Melbourne Storm headquarters at Princes Park. It is embarrassing but like watching a car crash or a GWS match, it is tough to look away. First up he starts to jabber like a mad man to some random cabbie and a totally disinterested Asian kid, neither of whom seem to follow rugby league. Then there is his rubbish justification on the plane. He then claims in a Melbourne cab that the readership of the Tele are demanding the trophy back, something even the readers of the Telegraph don’t care about. He is dropping names and then starts the slag on Craig Bellamy. He then seems to get annoyed at being made to wait by Frank Stanton and then ignored completely by him. He is incredulous that Dave Donaghy won’t let him take the trophy. He then calls John Brady and David Gallop at the NRL who both treat his attempts with the disdain Rothfield deserves including Gallop, whose meeting with NRL lawyers is interrupted by this stupid stunt. He then begs Gallop: “Can I please bring it back”. You won’t ever see anything like this again. Click Here

Lazy Long Bay Days, Part 14: Danny is recruited by a new gang. He is bought into a cell, stripped down to his underwear and then asked the question: “It is raining outside and you have an umbrella and I am getting wet. What do you do?” Wicks answers the question in a way that will not be good for his future at Long Bay. “I will invite you to share the umbrella with me.” He is now a prison bitch and he is forced to sleep in the same bed as the gang leader known as Mike Mongrel.

Beard Watch: Penrith rake Kevin Kingston has decided to bring back the garden gnome look of 2009 with a woolly bully beard that surely has the girls of western Sydney screaming for more and daydreaming the Kevin Kingston Daydream. The beard has certainly pushed him to grand heights this season with Double K outstanding for Penrith in 2010.

Correspondence Corner: Hannah Browne, of Melbourne, wrote to me last week and said: “Have you ever noticed that Nate Myles appears to have a ridiculously distorted head? It is the biggest head relative to a body I have ever seen. I wince every time I see him. His poor, poor mother.” Well Hannah, there isn’t much more to say other than hoho. I couldn’t think of anything else when watching the Saturday night match against the Sharks. His head really is huge.

Myles and soon-to-be former Prime Minister Kevin Rudd: Myles is the man without the douchebag grin.