Season 2010: Round 4

From The Couch

 

Ben Roberts, Put Your Head on the Block: The time has come for Kevin Moore to show his muscle and wield the axe and the first person that must go is Ben Roberts. Roberts was at his inept best on Monday night. He dropped the ball. He kicked it out on the full. He made shocking reads in defence, rushing out of the line and being caught flat footed. He missed tackles. He gave the Bulldogs no direction. His enthusiasm was non-existent. He was again a desperate failure of the highest order, a player more concerned with not getting a hair out of place than winning football games. With Ben Barba playing so well off the bench, providing spark and an ability to score tries, Moore needs to give him more time when the game is on the line. Barba is going to be a superstar and now his defence has become sturdier and his confidence higher, the time is right to play him. While he has the axe out, Moore needs to get rid of Blake Green. Green is an adequate player to have coming off the bench but he is not a starting second rower. The Bulldogs may be short there but a Daniel Harrison or a Brad Morrin is a better play than Blake Green.

One for the Future: Manly halfback Trent Hodkinson is a future representative player and a long-term solution to Manly’s halfback problem. It was thought the Eagles would struggle for halves this season with Matt Orford fleeing to England but Hodkinson has formed a nice partnership with fellow young gun Kieran Foran, allowing skipper Jamie Lyon to play centre, a position much more suited to his game. The most impressive element of Hodkinson’s game is his commitment to defence. He has been singled out since stepping up to grade and he has not been found short. Against the Warriors he made 38 tackles, missing only 1 and often getting under the ribs of opposition ball-runners. In that sense he looks like a young Andrew Johns, who became the benchmark for defensive halfbacks. His ability to guide the team around the park is also top notch for such a young player. He played a smart, conservative game against the Warriors when conditions dictated the importance of field position. Against the Knights and Eels he was much more expansive. When he starts running at the line a bit more, he is going to push himself into the class of halfbacks considered for representative honours. Give him a couple of years but he could be the man wearing the Blues seven jersey. My opinion on Manly has changed because of Hodkinson. They will finish well in the top eight and could even sneak into a preliminary final.

Only Nepotism Will Save David Furner: David Furner can consider himself extremely lucky that his brother Don is the CEO of the Raiders and his father Don is such an iconic and revered man in the Raiders organisation. If it weren’t for his ancestry or his blood he would almost certainly be on the breadline. He is a man without a plan and it is abundantly obvious in nearly every Raiders performance. The Raiders have struggled on the road for many years but rarely have they been so inept at home, so prone to blowing leads or so dull and predictable in attack. Under David Furner, the Raiders have won 10 from 28. At home the Raiders are 8-6 under Furner. That compares to 16-8 under Neil Henry and 36-24 under Elliott. This year the Raiders are 13th in points scored with 16 per match. In 2009 they ranked 12th with 20.4 points per match. That compares to 2nd with 26 points per in 2008 and 9th with 21.8 in 2007 and rankings of 7th, 15th, 8th and 6th over Matt Elliott’s final four seasons. The knives are out for Furner and so they should be. There is no doubt Furner has a team of young kids, that he is hampered by the inability of the Raiders to draw big names and his squad has suffered a number of injuries this year. Furner is not developing his talented kids though. Dugan is left to freewheel and is rarely a part of any structured attacking plan, if there is one. Croker hasn’t improved and is not being utilised. McCrone and Herbert both have no idea whether they are coming or going. Travis Waddell was not being played properly. Guns like Trevor Thurling and Joe Picker have gone backwards under Furner. David Furner really isn’t the man to coach Canberra. The Raiders need to make a play to bring Michael Maguire back to Australia and if Don Furner isn’t prepared to do that then the club needs a new chief executive too.

Boom Weekend for the Field Goal: What a weekend for the field goal! They were popping up left, right and centre with four games including a one-pointer. Most were meaningful. Cooper Cronk nailed one to give the Storm a winning buffer. Todd Carney did the same. Robbie Farah’s drop kick was to give the Tigers the lead. The most impressive field goal, however, belonged to new Sharks recruit Tim Smith. After Smith played a big part in guiding the Sharks to victory, he kicked a shanky drop goal that snuck over, the rain pouring and the final siren gone; to give the Sharks an 11-0 win. The Sharks were awarded a penalty 40 out but rather than take the two they tapped, took a settler and then Smith nailed the field goal. It was outstanding in its pointlessness. Welcome back Tim Smith, four words I never thought I would utter.

Congratulations Cronulla, You Have Won a Game: Well done to the Sharks for finally winning a game, ending a 13 game losing streak with a win over Parramatta. It was a horrid game and one that suggests Parramatta are not nearly as good as many (note: not this author) suggested preseason. Jarryd Hayne was again ordinary while many of the forwards looked to be going up and down in the one spot. But, well done to the Sharks. For the second time in two seasons they have ended long losing streaks to Parramatta. There will, however, be no apologies to Ricky Stuart. His team has had 9 and 13 game losing streaks over the last two years. He is still rubbish. It is that simple.

Power Rankings:

 

Rank	Team	Record	Last Week	High	Low
1	Melbourne	4-0	2	1	2
2	Dragons	3-1	1	1	2
3	Wests Tigers	3-1	3	3	6
4	Manly	2-2	7	4	10
5	Gold Coast	3-1	4	4	5
6	Roosters	3-1	9	4	9
7	Souths	2-2	13	7	16
8	Warriors	2-2	8	8	13
9	Canterbury	1-3	5	5	9
10	Penrith	2-2	10	9	11
11	Parramatta	1-3	6	3	11
12	Cowboys	2-2	14	12	14
13	Newcastle	1-3	11	10	13
14	Canberra	1-3	15	12	15
15	Brisbane	1-3	12	7	15
16	Cronulla	1-3	16	13	16

 

State of Origin Betting: Sportingbet has put up the most interesting rugby league markets this year to date, offering betting on the New South Wales captaincy, five-eighth, halfback and hooker. There is plenty of value to be found.

I won a nice bet on Kurt Gidley at $10 to win the captaincy last year but although he is the incumbent he is no value at $1.33. He almost certainly won’t be selected at fullback with Jarryd Hayne seemingly the darling of the selectors now meaning he will be in the mix with about four or five others for the five-eighth spot. The smart money is that he will be used as a bench utility, if he is selected at all. He has, of course, not played a game yet. As horrified as I am to say this, the best value is with Paul Gallen at $9. Gallen is a loathsome character but he is a certain selection, something that cannot be said about the first eight favourites. Gidley is injured and is likely headed for the bench. Nathan Hindmarsh will be fighting for two spots with around ten top class backrowers and has not started the season in wonderful form. The same is true for Anthony Watmough. Jamie Lyon has previously stated he did not want to play Origin and Craig Bellamy will not have forgotten that. Mitchell Pearce is a kid while Brett Kimmorley has to get in the side ahead of Pearce. Luke Bailey has virtually retired from rep footy. So that leaves Gallen. His image has changed a little this year and that may be enough to get him home. He will also bring stability to the leadership. Another at big odds worth a play may be Trent Barrett at $26. It makes me sad that two Cronulla players are the best bets but who knows what the idiot New South Wales selectors will do. They were dumb enough to pick Barrett so don’t put it beyond them to name him skipper.

Five-eighth is wide open. Hopefully selectors will realise that a big kicking game is required. Jamie Soward has to be in the mix. The $15 is good value. Terry Campese found some form on Sunday and must be some hope at $21. Leave me out of the shorts for Gidley (better at fullback), Bird (better in the backrow) and Barrett (too old and playing poorly for a rubbish team). Todd Carney at $6 is probably the best bet of the single figured six hopefuls. Carney has been outstanding for the Roosters and that team always gets favoured at the selection table. Soward should get the job but a hunch tells me it will go to Carney.

Halfback is probably a two horse race between Pearce and Kimmorley. $2.2 on Kimmorley is the better bet. Noddy won a game last year and he got the best of him in the head-to-head battle in round three. And selectors have proven time and time again they don’t mind picking a senior citizen. Those looking wider can have an interest on Barrett at $26 and Soward at $34. Selectors may go with Bird or Gidley at five-eighth and could try and slide one of these two into the seven jersey.

Mick Ennis did the job when called in for game three last year. Robbie Farah most likely had his card marked with his efforts in the first two matches. And Tim Sheens isn’t coaching this team. The $1.6 is the play.

Return of The Mogg: It is wonderful news that underrated back Adam Mogg returned not only to Australia but to the Canberra Raiders this week. Mogg got homesick and actually yearned for the crisp Canberra winter mornings, God bless his sweet heart. Mogg was immediately rushed back into the Raiders team amid talk from Queensland coach Mal Meninga that Mogg would be strongly considered for a spot in the Maroons team this season after he turned into an unlikely hero during the 2007 series. Raiders fans shouldn’t be surprised to see Mogg play halfback this year for Canberra. Marc Herbert was dropped after one match and Josh McCrone has been ordinary to date. Mogg played in the halves a lot for Catalans and with the Raiders short on inside backs he may be required to wear the seven.

Fun Fact # 1: Since 1986, Canterbury have had 36 players take a shot at goal at a strike rate of 75.09% with 2,814 conversions or penalty goals attempted.

Fun Fact # 2: Terry Lamb, Daryl Halligan and Hazem El Masri have taken 2,401 of the 2,814 shots at goal, kicking 1,860 of the 2,113 successful shots at goal.

Fun Fact # 3: Only 8 other players have kicked 10 goals for the Bulldogs over the last 25 years: Gavin Hill (73), Jonathan Davies (36), Jamie Corcoran (21), Luke Goodwin (15), Colin Whitfield (11), Brent Sherwin (11), Andrew Farrar (10) and Greg Barwick (10).

Fun Fact # 4: Three current Bulldogs have taken a kick for Canterbury with none having a success rate of above 50%. Bryson Goodwin (9/16), Mick Ennis (1/5) and Jamal Idris (0/1).

Fun Fact # 5: Lumbering prop Mitch Newton- think Jarrod Hickey fifteen years back- once took a shot at goal for Canterbury. It missed.

Rumours of the Week: Expect big changes at the Broncos in the next few weeks. Former Cowboys prop Shane Tronc, who signed with Wakefield this season, is set to return to Australia and sign with the Broncos as early as this week. The only thing holding the deal up is a compensation package with the Wildcats believed to be considering accepting a trade for unwanted clumsy backrower Ashton Sims. Ivan Henjak is under increasing pressure after a number of guileless performances from his team and may be gone before the end of the year. Anthony Griffin would step in as interim coach with Castleford coach Terry Matterson believed to have been courted to return to his former club. Last week Alan Langer was suspended for drink driving while it is believed two other members of the training/coaching staff came to blows. Broncos fans won’t tolerate such in-fighting and lack of competitiveness. Some big names will be gone sooner rather than later.

The Willie M Medal: The chase for last place, the first of the worst, a tribute to mediocrity in rugby league.

Melbourne-Dragons	3-Brett Morris (Dra)
	2-Matt Prior (Dra)
	1-Todd Lowrie (Mlb)
Roosters-Brisbane	3-Corey Norman (Brs)
	2-Mitch Rivett (Brs)
	1-Scott Anderson (Brs)
Sharks-Parramatta	3-Feleti Mateo (Par)
	2-Timana Tahu (Par)
	1-Adam Cuthbertson (Cro)
Cowboys-Titans	3-Joseph Tomane (GC)
	2-Preston Campbell (GC)
	1-Greg Bird (GC)
Warriors-Manly	3-Jesse Royal (War)
	2-Wade McKinnon (War)
	1-Michael Robertson (Man)
Canberra-Tigers	3-Josh McCrone (Can)
	2-Todd Payten (Tig)
	1-Tom Learoyd-Lars (Can)
Newcastle-Penrith	3-Steve Simpson (New)
	2-Cooper Vuna (New)
	1-Shannon McDonnell (New)
Souths-Bulldogs	3-Ben Roberts (Bul)
	2-Blake Green (Bul)
	1-Josh Morris (Bul)
Leaderboard	7-Chris Sandow (Sou)
	6-Eric Grothe (Par), Ben Roberts (Bul), Steve Simpson (New)
	5-Albert Kelly (Cro), Josh McCrone (Can), Denan Kemp (Brs), Michael Robertson (Man)

 

Thanks to Fisky, who was the guest judge for the Knights-Panthers match. Fisky is the greatest red headed rugby league intellectual since Michael Speechley.

Tupou Heaven: Last Tuesday was a real trip for those monitoring team changes with two separate William Tupou’s named to make their debut for two separate clubs. Both are wingers. Both play in NRL outposts. Will Tupou made his first NRL appearance against the Titans on Saturday evening and was rarely extended, doing enough to suggest he will be back next round. Bill Tupou made a big run and looked menacing but will be sidelined by the return of Manu Vatuvei soon. Having said that, Bill looks to have a more promising future that Will. Both will be better than Tame and more likable than Anthony.

Strange Dreams: I woke up from a terrifying dream last Wednesday morning. It was a vision of the upcoming Grand Final and the Bulldogs were not involved. My vision didn’t provide a result but it did have Melbourne playing the Roosters in the Grand Final for 2010. The vision was horrific in how real it seemed. The only odd part was that Brian Smith took the Roosters to Dubai in preparation. While that may seem a tad askew, I put nothing beyond Brian Smith and such a Grand Final lead-up didn’t stir me in the slightest. Lets hope I am no rugby league psychic as I do not want to see the Roosters anywhere near the finals series let along heading to The Big Dance.

Exchanges with Fisk:

Tedeschi on Ben Roberts I: “My best hope is somebody breaks his fucking leg.”

Tedeschi on Ben Roberts II: “We have a new favourite for the Willie M”

Fisk in response: “Don’t forget Steve Simpson”

Tedeschi on Steve Simpson: “He got old quick, like Rip Van Winkle”

Tedeschi on Mo Blair: “Mo Blair. Still fat. I think he ate Owen Craigie.”

Tedeschi on Ben Hannant: “Lazy prick.”

Fisk on Referees: “These idiots are making it a game of touch football.”

Coaching Stocks:

Craig Bellamy [5] Clearly the best team in the NRL after handing it to the Dragons. Another decider awaits.

Wayne Bennett [5] Wouldn’t be too upset. Dragons a little too reckless against the Storm but overall were very good.

Tim Sheens [4] Another disappointing start but team showed maturity to bounce back. Just re-signed.

Kevin Moore [3.5] Humiliating defeat. Has to drop Roberts immediately. Attitude problem cost Dogs dearly.

John Cartwright [3.5] Disappointing against Cowboys but had excuses without Prince and Laffranchi.

Brian Smith [3] The class of Todd Carney got the Roosters home. A far from impressive win.

Des Hasler [2.5] Lucky to get the points against the Warriors. Steady young halves considered, good victory.

Matt Elliott [2 Huge comeback victory. Never threw the towel in on the road. May kick start a run.

Rick Stone [1.5] The Knights cannot afford to throw games away like they did against Penrith. Brutal beat.

Daniel Anderson [1.5] Bitterly awful defeat. Forwards aren’t firing. Halves have been dreadful. Not enough commitment.

John Lang [1.5] His big boppers are starting to fire. Now using Luke right. Best gameplan all year.

David Furner [1] Put up a big first half effort before capitulating. He is the main problem in Canberra, not his players.

Neil Henry [1] Wielded the axe and got the points. Unimpressive but a win is a win.

Ivan Henjak [0] Disgraceful. Effort is sorely lacking. Has let storied club spiral out of control. Gone and soon.

Ricky Stuart [0] Ended losing streak with gutsy win over Eels. Showed plenty of fight when chips were down.

Ivan Cleary [-3] Another pathetic display where bad ball handling cost them. No composure. Vinegar back on.

Game of the Year Nomination, Week 4: Melbourne-Dragons, 17-4. There are those that love attacking rugby league and would have nominated Sunday’s Tigers comeback over the Raiders as the best of the round. I, however, prefer the arm wrestle, the test of strength, the inch-by-inch battle that is trench warfare. And that is exactly what we got at the Docklands on Friday afternoon on a day that was most certainly good. It was a classic game of rugby league that was never going to cause too much heartache for the scoreboard attendant. The first half was a real feel-out with neither team trying a lot. Melbourne went into the break 4-0 on the back of two penalty goals. Defence was hard and desperate, attitudes were fiery and field position was the priority. Melbourne jumped the gun after the break to score two in nine minutes and build a 12-0 lead, the second to Dane Nielson a beautiful play set up by Cooper Cronk and Billy Slater that left Matt Cooper looking old and foolish. “Florence” Nightingale scored for the Dragons soon after but Billy Slater gave the Storm a 16-4 lead after 67 minutes with a Cooper Cronk field goal sealing the match minutes later. Surprisingly, the Dragons were the more expansive team, offloading 16 times to 5 but playing wide didn’t work with the brilliant Storm defence forcing the Dragons to make more errors. The completion rates told the story with Melbourne’s 80% well ahead of the Dragons 68%. Melbourne also made the most with the ball as Brett Finch and Billy Slater made a mess of the Dragons right side defence. The Dragons lost few admirers but there is no doubting Melbourne are on the march to a fifth straight decider.

Stats from the Penguin: The Retarded Penguin received a recall this week after Dean Collis hurt himself and he actually played competently. He still made two handling errors and looked life flipper trying to catch a beach ball when he was thrown the footy but he did lay on the Sharks match winning try.

14 runs for 134 metres, 1 try assist, 14 tackles, 1 missed, 2 errors

Beard Watch: This week the haircut of Dragons backrower Jeremy Smith needs a mention. From a distance it looks like he has a merkin attached to his scalp. It sits there, all soft and curly like pubic hair and it appears as if it could fall off at any moment. It is the worst haircut in the NRL. Get it together Jeremy Smith #2.

Fantasy Team of the Week:

1. Todd Carney (Roo)
2. Akuila Uate (New)
3. Willie Tonga (NQ)
4. Beau Champion (Sou)
5. Blake Ferguson (Cro)
6. Terry Campese (Can)
7. Johnathan Thurston (NQ)
13. Paul Gallen (Cro)
12. Sam Burgess (Sou)
11. Ashley Harrison (GC)
10. Luke Bailey (GC)
9. Isaac Luke (Sou)
8. Ben Hannant (Bul)

Waiver Wire Advice: Cowboys fullback Shannon Gallant is a great pickup at $148k after a brilliant debut for the Cowboys. Gallant was a late inclusion for the injured Ty Williams, who throughout the first three rounds has been exceptionally ordinary, and should keep the fullback position at least until the return of Matt Bowen with a scintillating display that saw him get two try assists, make two line breaks and record nearly 200 metres running. Another pickup is Liam Fulton. Fulton is still cheap and should have been picked up preseason but even if he wasn’t it isn’t too late now. He is a fantasy gun. Coming off the bench he scored 2 tries, made 2 line breaks and made 29 tackles. He should be back in the starting side this week.

Lazy Long Bay Days, Part 5: Danny is paralysed by guilt and decides to help Chris. He approaches Sergeant Smith, a prison guard renowned for playing in the gutter. “Hey Sarge, can I have a minute.” “You have plenty longer than a minute” came the reply. “Six to eight isn’t it?” “Sarge, the bikies have Houston. “They have raped him, beaten him, terrified him. You gotta do something,” said Wicks. “I don’t gotta do nothing” the prison officer said, giving Wicks a shot with a nightstick at the same time.

Watch It: This postgame wrap-up Click Here of the 1980 Grand Final. They gave it to Bob Fulton. Ron Casey discussed the big issues: the presentation dais, children running onto the field, the sponsorship of goal posts, the lack of a jumper swap post-match, the lap of honour. “It was an abortion of a thing to say” was the highlight, a statement that would get any television personality fired in these days of political correctness. Get a gander at Peter Peters haircut and mo. Frank Hyde and “Pinky” Prenter both look a treat. Hysterical. What a blast from the past.

Correspondence Corner: A man going only by the name of Blacktip_Reefy appeared to take exception to my piece debunking the Ricky Stuart Myth. He went on to refer to this author in the exceptionally mature way as “a loser of the greatest order”, “deranged”, “suss”, “ugly” and “a weirdo”. A few comments in passing to this super-fan of mine. Firstly, there would be a signed, autographed photo sent out as soon as possible but this literary wizard has chosen not to man up and put a name and face to his words. A real shame. Everybody loves a forum hero. Secondly, he failed to offer one argument in defence of Stuart. Seemingly he either agrees with me or he is just incapable of putting together a readable sentence. Finally, it is symptomatic (this means indicative Blacktip_Reefy) of the Sharks systemic failure that their fans are too ignorant and placid to see the obvious and go after Ricky Stuart’s head. That lack of fire, total ignorance and want to lash out at an outsider goes a long way to explaining why the Sharks have never won a premiership in over four decades of play and why they most likely never will before they wither and die.

Also, a big apology to the family of Jamie Walker. By all reports, talk of Ricky Stuart has created a major rift. Come on guys…let’s just all agree that those agreeing with me are correct and will be purchased a beer by those who disagree. There is no need for any violence, tension or harsh words. It is, of course, only Cronulla.